December 28, 2022

Dear Pastor,

I am 50 years old and I am married. My husband is in his 60s. We have two grown children. My husband and I do not argue or fuss about anything, except sex. He used to be good at it, but now that he is getting old, he struggles.

Sometimes I see that he is very frustrated because he can hardly get it up. There are times that he has no difficulty at all. I don’t know what the problem is. He has been to doctors, but his situation has not improved. I told my husband to rest more and to get off the smoking and drinking. However, he loves his white rum. I just wonder if you could recommend what I can do to help my husband, and what he can do to help himself.

I am looking forward to hearing from you.


Dear MR,

Your husband and you need to engage in long foreplay. You, as his wife, should help him in that. You shouldn’t be in a hurry for him to penetrate you, because you know the struggles he is having sometimes. You should also learn to sweet talk your husband long before you all go to bed, and tell him some stories about what both of you used to do together. It would help him to get into a good mood and to relax him. Never fuss with your husband when he is having problems; it would make the situation worst.

Although he is in his 60s, I am sure he would love to see you in lovely lingeries. So if it doesn’t get cold where you are living, put away those long ‘grandma’ nightgowns and take the initiative to play with your husband from time to time. Ask his doctor whether he or she would advice your husband to use drugs, such as Viagra and Cialis, to help him function much better. Unless the doctor gives him permission, he should keep away from these drugs. Remember that your husband is not young, so he will not be fast on the draw as when he was young. Some drugs may cause side effects, so make sure your husband talks to a doctor.


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