A woman whose husband has sex with her in his sleep feels abused

A woman who “cannot help feeling used” because her husband is sleeping and having sex with her due to a rare disease is warned that she is being molested and should not share a bed with him

  • A mother on Mumsnet asked what to do about her husband’s “sexomnia”
  • The man would stroke her in his sleep, tear her clothes and penetrate her
  • Commentators urged her to sleep elsewhere and get him to seek medical help










A woman whose husband unwittingly groped and had sex with her because of a rare sleep disorder was warned that she was being molested

The Briton attended the Baby Center parenting forum to explain how her husband, with whom she has been with for ten years, strips, pats and penetrates her while they are both asleep.

“It’s mostly just a minor annoyance to me, he doesn’t do it every night, but he can go through phases where things get better and worse,” she wrote. “Most of the time I wake up and it touches the clothes, he cares and pokes, his hands in my underwear. But I almost always wake up quickly and usually shove him hard, which wakes him up and then obviously stops. ‘

Sexsomnia is a recognized sleep disorder, or form of parasomnia, that causes a person to involuntarily engage in sexual activity.

While some commentators said he cannot be blamed, others were very concerned that he had never sought help for the condition and doubted his claim that he had a sleep disorder.

A woman went to the baby center to ask if she was entitled to feel hurt after her partner had sex with her while she was sleeping

A woman went to the baby center to ask if she was entitled to feel hurt after her partner had sex with her while she was sleeping

The shaken woman asked for advice on what to do and said she was

The shaken woman asked for advice on what to do and said she was “between anger, tears and hurt.”

Explaining her husband’s nightly habits, the woman wrote, “Sometimes I wake up and find my clothes taken off or pulled down.

“It has an effect on me because even though I’ve trusted my partner for ten years and I know he’s asleep and can’t help it, I feel used and vulnerable. It’s hard to explain how I feel.”

“I woke up earlier because he tried to have real sex with me once or twice. It was the easy penetration that woke me up. ‘

“We didn’t go to bed until 4:00 this morning after we’d had a drink with friends, both of them had a lot to drink. I woke up while he was having sex with me. ‘

Commentators immediately told the woman to get her husband to seek help immediately and not sleep in the same room as him

Commentators immediately told the woman to get her husband to seek help immediately and not sleep in the same room as him

What is Sex Somnia?

“Sexsomnia” or sleep sex is a sleep disorder or form of parasomnia that causes a person to involuntarily engage in sexual activity.

The disorder was first discovered in the 1990s but brought to the public in the 2003 issue of the Canadian Journal of Psychiatry.

It was originally classified as a parasomnia, which refers to undesirable behavior while sleeping.

This category also includes: sleepwalking, speaking, grinding teeth, even getting up and other actions.

Certain triggers are believed to increase the likelihood of sexomnia occurring, including alcohol consumption.

Although research into sexomnia is patchy, it is believed that the condition is very rare.

Healthline reports that the most common symptoms include:

  • Induce stroking or foreplay with bed partner
  • Pelvic thrust
  • Behaviors that mimic sexual intercourse
  • later not being aware of the behavior

She added, “It was only a few seconds before I screamed and he woke up and let go, but it was the first time I was scared.”

Other users of the baby center urged her to get out of the room and into the night and get him to seek help immediately, saying she had to protect herself from him.

One posted: does he remember that ?? My husband always suffered from sex somnia, but he never remembered it! I felt awful when we found out what was going on because I was going to join in, so it almost felt like raped? ‘

Another noted that she is sexually abused whether he sleeps or not and said, “You don’t have to accept sexual abuse just because it’s caused by a disease, not least an * undiagnosed *.”

“Don’t share a bed with him again until this condition has been diagnosed and treated. If it is a medical matter, it is not his fault, it is his responsibility to do something about it, and not your responsibility to simply tolerate it. ‘

The woman later responded to a comment asking if he remembered his nightly assaults: “No, he doesn’t remember. I don’t participate because I don’t want to have sex. It usually happens more after he tried it and I turned it down. As if it comes to his mind when he falls asleep. ‘

Then someone replied that it was unfair to blame him and said, “I think it’s probably a little unreasonable to expect an apology for something that he doesn’t remember and then can’t control.”

“Be sure to talk about it and still try to identify a trigger!”

Another person disagreed, however, wondering why he was no longer worried about his sleeping habits: “I thought about it and at first I thought well that it might not be his fault if he was passed out, but he knew this was one Issue for years and has (presumably) done nothing about it and is therefore at fault. ‘

Two commentators disagreed as to whether their husband was to blame during the sleeping attack

Two commentators disagreed as to whether their husband was to blame during the sleeping attack

display

.

Leave a Comment